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asyndeta
05 January 2006 @ 11:31 pm
I have yet to find one person in the whole world who likes this guy.  
I've always been a peaceful man
Spread joy and harmony whenever I can
Wars of words are the only ones I've fought
Not used to having such violent thoughts

But I may just have to murder James Blunt
He's an evil that I must confront
I'm well aware that he was in the military
But dragon ninja training wouldn't save his scrawny ass from me

There's no court that would convict me of a crime
Because if I hear 'You're Beautiful' one more bloody time
Into the fiery pits of hell he will descend
I know his 'life is brilliant', but I may have to bring it to an end

Yes, I may just have to murder James Blunt
He might sound better with his head on back to front
Before he cuts another disc the git must hang
He's the only man in history who's his own rhyming slang

And for the sake of all I must act
Then I'll get Katie Melua as well and make it look like a suicide pact
If you think this is a joke - well, it isn't
Please God someone stop me
Before I murder James Blunt.

God bless you, Mitch Benn.
 
 
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: 'The Now Show' - Radio 4
 
18 comments | Leave a comment
 
( 18 comments — Post a new comment )
scarlet's walk[info]kisstheviolets on January 5th, 2006 05:02 pm (UTC)
oh that is brilliant! i swear lately, all our radio station where i work plays, is a mixture of james blunt, kelly clarkson, simple plan & black eyed peas. i'm going insane!!
[info]clippage on January 5th, 2006 06:20 pm (UTC)
Is James Blunt really popular in the UK then? Because we NEVER hear it here, it wasn't until Leo told me about it (Welsh, by birth, hubby, etc) that I even knew it existed. I love that song... but I can imagine it's being horrendously overplayed, like that song by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crowe a few years back "Picture" or whatever.

/random>
[info]asyndeta on January 5th, 2006 06:29 pm (UTC)
I think 'horrendously overplayed' is the phrase, yes. It topped the singles chart here for...I can't remember, about 5 weeks? Adolescent girls LOVE the bastard; everyone else wants to tear out his innards with a rusty spoon.
[info]clippage on January 5th, 2006 06:46 pm (UTC)
Ugh, I can relate to the over-played feeling, I know I'd hate him too if that was the case.. as it is.. I like his voice, I like the song... but I agree, overplaying can make you hate ANYTHING.
C.J.[info]atlanta06 on January 5th, 2006 06:39 pm (UTC)
What's wrong with James Blunt? *hugs him* They rarely play him where I am,so maybe I'm not tired of him yet...
[info]asyndeta on January 5th, 2006 06:48 pm (UTC)
Oh God, you will. >_> After the fiftieth time or so, you will want to kill him with an icepick.
C.J.[info]atlanta06 on January 5th, 2006 07:46 pm (UTC)
...not as long as he keeps taking off his shirt..rawr...I'll just mute him and watch him strip by then...
[info]asyndeta on January 5th, 2006 07:57 pm (UTC)
Excellent plan. The song pisses me off but I can watch him take his shirt off all day.
C.J.[info]atlanta06 on January 5th, 2006 08:04 pm (UTC)
Amen.
♥ κept ςlose[info]keptclose on January 6th, 2006 10:07 am (UTC)
Lmfao. I have a feeling I'm blessed not to know who the hell that is.
Anna[info]colouredhorizon on January 6th, 2006 06:58 pm (UTC)
i friended you. This poem is friggen hilarious, i do agree with you partially. He's voice is really annoying but murer is a little harsh don't u think? lol
[info]asyndeta on January 6th, 2006 07:27 pm (UTC)
XD No. Murder is...appropriate.
Anna[info]colouredhorizon on January 7th, 2006 07:08 pm (UTC)
haha if that's what you want, but i won't participate in it, i'll be a bystander
The Chick with a Hat Fetish[info]nota_lone on January 15th, 2006 01:42 pm (UTC)
Sorry to bother you on your private journal, but you might want to check potterpuff_fans. A community has been found that turns Potterpuffs into LotR characters (changing color and line-art). I didn't get the whole thing, but they're either attempting to sell it, or just not crediting you. ^^
-butting out of your journal now-
(Anonymous) on January 15th, 2006 05:28 pm (UTC)
ahahahaha
I find the entry highly amusing, but what gets me even more is how you said that only adolescent girls like him...my 26-year-old straight male teacher bought his CD the other day. xDD
[info]sheena_bandy on January 15th, 2006 05:36 pm (UTC)
well, I'm not here or there on the guy, but... you know me, I kill for the art of it... *thinks of different methods* ^_^
[info]missamerika22 on January 18th, 2006 01:39 am (UTC)
Hi, I hope you don't mind this comment, but I wanted to ask your permission about something. I saw your wonderful Death Eater potterpuffs, in their underwear, and I was inspired to write a fanfic about it. I will certainly credit you as the inspiring source, I was simply wondering if you would mind. Thanks!!
[info]asyndeta on January 18th, 2006 04:45 am (UTC)
Go ahead.